The 49-year-old had her first breast cancer diagnosis in 2015.
Charmed and 90210 actress Shannen Doherty has been fighting breast cancer for years. Now as her cancer metastasizes, Doherty revealed that she plans to put together videos for her loved ones as a way of saying farewell. Understandably, she's having a hard time coming to terms with actually recording those videos or writing the farewell letters as it "feels so final," she said, according to Elle. She said she's not ready to be put "out to pasture." The Charmed star received her first breast cancer diagnosis in 2015.
"I haven’t sat down to write letters. That’s something I need to do. There are things I need to say to my mom. I want my husband [Kurt Iswarienko] to know what he’s meant to me. But whenever it comes time for me to do it, it feels so final. It feels like you’re signing off, and I’m not signing off. I feel like I’m a very, very healthy human being. It’s hard to wrap up your affairs when you feel like you’re going to live another 10 or 15 years," she told the publication. The 49-year-old also admitted that she appreciated the small joys in life, saying, "I try to treasure all the small moments that most people don’t really see or take for granted. The small things are magnified for me. We have this endless well within us, and it’s just about continuing to dig in that well for the strength to face adversity—and so that we can also see all the beauty. It’s like anybody with Stage IV faces this sort of thing, where others want to put you out to pasture. I’m not ready for pasture. I’ve got a lot of life in me.".
In 2019, @DohertyShannen's breast cancer resurfaced as metastatic. "It’s like anybody with Stage IV faces this thing where others want to put you out to pasture. I’m not ready for pasture. I’ve got a lot of life in me.” @KatePickert https://t.co/zeRWdMoEST— ELLE Magazine (US) (@ELLEmagazine) October 14, 2020
For Doherty, this disease has only brought her closer to her husband, Iswarienko. "Kurt and I look at each other with such profound respect now. He was my rock in every way possible, and he made sure I knew how much he loved and valued me. We have a much deeper appreciation [for each other] now, and a much larger capacity for forgiveness," she told PEOPLE. She confessed that while her marriage was good, the couple did go through some "growing pains" which would see them "lock horns" and would lead them to not speaking for a couple of days instead of resolving it then and there. But now they don't take each other for granted. Instead, she says, "We don't let a night go by mad at each other. The last time we had a big argument was pre-cancer."
The actress announced the return of her breast cancer after she was in remission in 2017, earlier this year. She shared her story with Good Morning America at the time saying, "It's going to come out in a matter of days or a week that -- I'm stage four. So my cancer came back. And that's why I'm here. I don't think I've processed it. It's a bitter pill to swallow in a lot of ways." She added, "I definitely have days where I say why me. And then I go, well, why not me? Who else? Who else besides me deserves this? None of us do," she said. "But I would say that my first reaction is always concern about how -- how am I going to tell my mom, my husband."
Doherty initially wanted to keep the news private. But later decided that "I'd rather people hear it from me. I don't want it to be twisted. I don't want it to be a court document. I want it to be real and authentic," she said. "And I want to control the narrative. I want people to know from me, I just didn't want them to know yet."
Doherty's Beverly Hills, 90210 costar Jason Priestley praised her for being a fighter. "I reach out to Shannen every few months, just to check in on her and say hi. Shannen's a real tough girl, and Shannen's a fighter, and she's always been a fighter," he noted. "And I know that she will continue to fight as hard as she can. Last time I heard from her, she was in pretty good spirits," Priestley, 51, said on Australia's Studio 10 show, as per PEOPLE.
We previously reported that the actor was heartbroken at the news of her diagnosis. We hope she continues to be strong and resilient during these tough times.